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ME/CFS South Australia Inc supports the needs of sufferers of Myalgic Encephalomyelitis, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and related illnesses. We do this by providing services and information to members.
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'The Way Of The Tired Person': Life Rules For The Perpetually Exhausted
Tuesday 28 January 2020
From UK newspaper The Guardian:
 When it all gets too much, there is always the guilt-free nap. (Photograph: Taubenberger/Getty Images.) |
'The way of the tired person': life rules for the perpetually exhausted
Sometimes weariness is inevitable, but as one chronic fatigue sufferer has learned, when you can’t hit snooze on life there are ways of getting through it
I’ve lived with chronic fatigue syndrome for a decade now, which means I’m practically a Professional Tired Person. I work tired. I travel tired. I go on dates tired. I mop the bathroom tired. Medical science still hasn’t worked out why this is (there are several boring competing theories), but I know I’m not alone. You don’t have to have a chronic illness to feel crappy in this modern life. Work, kids, existential dread – they all take energy. Which is why it pays to have some strategies for living a functional life when all you want to do is nap.
Lower your standards
I have a friend who threw a dinner party for her in-laws two weeks after having a baby. While applauding her ambition, I also secretly thought: “If that was me, they’d be lucky to get takeaway pizza sitting on a couch decorated with unfolded laundry.” Because this is the way of the Tired Person: embracing the bare minimum and trying not to feel too guilty about it.
Do those dishes really need to be done tonight? Can dry shampoo get you through another day before a hair wash and blow-dry? Does it really matter if you feed people something out of the microwave rather than a homemade meal? There’s an art to cutting corners, and it’s mostly about what you can ditch while still looking in the mirror and recognising yourself as human. If dishwashing, haircare or cooking is your one true passion, then of course feel free to chuck something else.
The hardest bit is doing all this and not feeling guilty. If it helps, remember that guilt requires time and energy, which can be better used ice-skating, having sex or playing board games. Don’t waste it on making yourself feel sad and ashamed.
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